Ehwaz looks like the letter M.  It represents big ideas, but can also be related to partnership as the M might be seen to resemble two horses facing each other.  This is the rune of new ideas and adventures.  A big trip may be underway or a move away from home.  In terms of partnership, it might mean meeting an equal.  Two horses working as one have much greater potential than one.  Things may speed up during this time.  Situations and circumstances might be expected to change dramatically.

As far as healing goes, Ehwaz represents forgiveness.  It is important to make peace with the past and forgive one’s self as well as others before progress can be made.  Trust needs to be regained.  It may be important to do an inventory at this point, to see where one has been wronged and done wrong.  Making amends will bring healing.  This is important to consider before entering into a partnership.  You want to go into any new enterprise with a clean slate.

I’d been out there running like a lone wolf for many years, and it was always my inclination to stick to my solitary ways.  The pandemic had forced me back to Southern California and I had been living with my mother during that time.  We’d basically been helping each other get through it, and now that it was letting up, I didn’t really know what to do anymore. 

If I could find a way to stay in California I would.  If I could go back to making music that would be a dream.  But I couldn’t do it on my own.  Unless I did a better job of reaching out to others, I risked being shipwrecked on the island of lost dreams forever.  It wouldn’t be easy, however.  A few hours back in the States and I was already feeling the strain.  I picked up the Tibetan Book of the Dead and started leafing through it again.

A soul that is traveling through the wasteland of the bardo, in between incarnations, is frightened and confused.  It wants to take refuge in a womb.  It rushes towards one of the realms, not knowing where to go.  The realm of hell is characterized by a dark land with red and black houses, black pits, and black roads.  There is unbelievable suffering, extreme heat and cold.  Do not go there.

The realm of the hungry ghosts is marked by black tree stumps and shallow caves.  There are black patches everywhere.  Do not go there or you will suffer from endless hunger and thirst.  In the realm of the animals, you see everything through a mist.  There are rock caves and holes in the ground.  The houses are made of straw.  Avoid going there.  That of the jealous god is one of beautiful graves and revolving wheels of fire.  Do not enter there.  Instead, think of resistance.  The realm of gods has many temples and is full of jewels.  Enter if you must.

We all know what the human realm is like.  Do not return unless you plan to save those who suffer.  No.  Do not enter into any of the realms of existence if you have a choice.  Instead, pray to be liberated from the cycle of birth and death.  Pray for nirvana, where there is no self, no suffering, no karma, only transcendence.  Pray to the Buddha and the multiple bodhisattvas for release.

This flight would not be the opportunity for such an escape.  Instead, there was a medical emergency halfway to Los Angeles.  My only prayer was that they wouldn’t bring the flight down.  When we arrived at LAX there were fire engines and ambulances waiting for us on the runway.  We were going to have to wait to exit the plane. 

Some emergency personnel came aboard and helped a man to his feet.  He had a shaved head and many tattoos.  I could almost guess the nature of his ailment.  He didn’t want to go with them.  He was saying he was fine.  At this point that wasn’t an option.  He was going to go for a ride in an ambulance, and then maybe a police car after that.